Coming Undone

I unzip my chest like I unzip my jacket.

Bumblebees, butterflies and lions dwell in somber living; I come undone in an attempt to come back together, stronger. Like broken pottery returning it’s pieces together with a seal of gold. We can’t save each other, we can only save ourselves and show how beautiful and rewarding that process can be if we begin – and if we see it through. If we become dedicated and disciplined. If we choose devotion over despair. Love through surrender and water upon flame, cooling the parts of ourselves that are overheated and singed.

Our own power. Our greatest threat – becoming self-responsible. It’s seems like we’ll take the world down in an effort to avoid this reality. “No, it’s him. Him. Him! It’s not me.”

We throw ourselves at others in an attempt to rescue, rescue, rescue. We try to become a hero in the eyes of our community and loved ones, knocking at the doors of validity like we’ve been locked out. And we’re beginning to panic.

Quiet, darling. It’s not your door.

When we move on we feel like we are leaving things behind, like we’re abandoning a part of ourselves. Cut off, it’s still twitching like a tail or the body of a chicken and we can’t tell if it’s more awkward to collect it or walk away. When life turns into chasing an out of control football, it just gets weird. Perhaps I would be more critical if it didn’t get weird, I believe our complacency will challenge our peace more than anything. Learning not to step into fear for being frightened and timidness in doing things anyways despite the sensation will limit our compassion and the ability to believe and trust that things truly do work out in the end.

Our doubt has been left out too long and it’s becoming sticky, and a trap for some. How do we undress and stay proper at the same time? How do we combine manners and respect with our spontaneity and our wildness while at the same time try to sprinkle in a little bit of humor? Or a lot. I can’t judge your appetite.

So serious about our seriousness that it’s seriously sterilizing. In a time that doesn’t seem laughable, I crave it. I have to seek it out or try to initiate it, or  at least let it happen. ESPECIALLY if it is at myself.

Make a bad joke. Take that chance, push comes to shove you at least get a smile. Hopefully. I’m staying hope-full. No time is wasted anticipating positive results. It’s when we waste our time with worry and freight that it becomes impossible to live.

Do not give that up. The living. The breathing. The feeling of having a heart beat. Work up that heart beat, tire that body with something productive and rewarding. You will find naturally those thoughts of ours have less power afterwards. We need exertion, fresh air and a good friend to listen. If you have those things, celebrate them, if you don’t; find them. I guarantee they are closer and more accessible than you may realize. No one will look in your eyes and know what you are thinking. We must ask for what we need. And everyone’s needs are different – but we are human. And in many ways our needs are similar and basic.

Find places where you can come undone. Where you can lay down your complications and exist in a moment of pure presence. Notice you’re environment. Feel your skin. These fleshy body suits can be heavy; don’t forget to unzip your deepest pockets, drop whatever shit you find – and become Light.

Let’s share our pain, yes yes. Let’s explore the darkness, yes yes. But let’s never forget what and WHO WE ARE. White light. Human prisms. Warriors in the form of candles. Soft and able. Stars with a pulse.

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